By: Feyza Baysal
Be The Representation You Desire to See
It was Quad Day and I was looking for an engineering club to join. I passed by “Eco-Illini Supermileage” and I was intrigued because it was the perfect blend of environmentalism and engineering that I was looking for(despite having no prior knowledge about cars). I stood in a long line to sign up, composed almost entirely of white or asian males. I remember standing there with confidence, but it was all a facade. Internally I felt intimidated and afraid. It’s hard not to when you’re a 5’0 ft tall female hijabi amongst a crowd of “car guys”. I remember going home and Googling the club to see if there were any females on the team. Amongst all the pictures I found one image with one female in it. As superficial as it seems that one image gave me hope. Hope that I will be accepted and treated equally.
Be The Representation You Desire to See
It was Quad Day and I was looking for an engineering club to join. I passed by “Eco-Illini Supermileage” and I was intrigued because it was the perfect blend of environmentalism and engineering that I was looking for(despite having no prior knowledge about cars). I stood in a long line to sign up, composed almost entirely of white or asian males. I remember standing there with confidence, but it was all a facade. Internally I felt intimidated and afraid. It’s hard not to when you’re a 5’0 ft tall female hijabi amongst a crowd of “car guys”. I remember going home and Googling the club to see if there were any females on the team. Amongst all the pictures I found one image with one female in it. As superficial as it seems that one image gave me hope. Hope that I will be accepted and treated equally.
I look back at this experience and realize how valuable representation is, but more importantly the power YOU hold in ending the cycle of a lack of representation. If you see a lack of representation for your people, it’s because they also feel the same emotions you’re going through. Without bravery, resilience, GRIT, and confidence the cycle is only further perpetuated. The world is working against you already, but you cannot allow yourself to also work against you. It’s far easier said than done. It requires constant self-reflection and re-evaluation to ensure you are pushing your boundaries. As you find yourself falling into the trap of fear, realize you are the change others like you are waiting to see.
It’s these traits of resilience and constant self-growth that are integral to a good leader. The value in diversity is derived through the wide range of “life tests” each person experiences: the trials and tribulations that strengthen individuals. That’s what produces a successful cohort of individuals.
Be Comfortable With Discomfort – Through Structure?
“Be aware of what you are good at and capitalize on it.” -Jennifer Weber
By far the most pivotal and inspirational speaker I heard this semester in my Technology and Management Seminar course was Jennifer Weber from Boeing. While this quote may seem contradictory to searching for discomfort, it’s the foundation to finding discomfort you thrive in.
Jennifer stated two main questions you should constantly be asking yourself:
1.What are you good at?
2.What do others think you’re good at?
Being able to evaluate yourself both intrapersonally and interpersonally allows you to understand how others differ in the way they view you compared to yourself. You may not have been aware of strengths you had or even weaknesses. A flexible and adaptable leader is one who is aware of their traits and is constantly learning from themselves and their team.
Once you have found your core traits and advantages you can easily “capitalize on it”. How do you capitalize on your strengths? By taking on new opportunities despite the discomfort they may cause. For Jennifer this is what led her from materials testing to managing an engineering team at Boeing. Having confidence in your core strengths and values is what makes discomfort comfortable, opening up new opportunities.
Jennifer’s experiences and advice parallels perfectly with one of my experiences this semester. I knew my strengths resided in communication, teamwork, and organization. I capitalized off these strengths and became a Physics 100 Learning Assistant. Despite having no prior teaching experience, took on the discomfort and became a great LA. I felt an immense amount of fulfillment being able to help students with a topic I struggled with myself. Through my prior struggles I knew exactly how my students felt, making my teaching more interconnected and personal compared to a professor or TA. Being an LA reinforced the importance of keeping communication open and taught me techniques to provide an environment that fosters growth- an environment that worked against toxic competition.
Imposter Syndrome and Honesty
Imposter Syndrome: Feelings of self-doubt and personal incompetence that persist despite your education, experience, and accomplishments.
Not many admit to their struggles with imposter syndrome because it’s associated with weakness. The silence surrounding imposter syndrome only further amplifies its effects. Open dialogue about these issues is vital, instead of joking it off. I believe as a community if engineers were far more emotionally aware we would succeed further both personally and in our careers. I’ve had numerous people tell me how shocked they are by my honesty. I don’t hide many struggles, especially when I know expressing my struggles will help others. Honesty towards yourself and others is what allows us to defy imposter syndrome. The majority of technology related jobs require heavy levels of teamwork and Emotional Intelligence is paramount to the success of a group, even more than IQ. Casper from the Project Management Institute shares “The documentation is overwhelming, high EI[Emotional Intelligence]contributes to project success and impacts the bottom line.” Effectively using EI leads to “building networks to problem solve and create” within a group. Your EI is flexible unlike IQ.
How do I improve my EI? EI is measured and can be improved by practicing “self awareness, self management, self motivation, interpersonal management, and leadership”.
So maybe my entire engineering career so far has relied more heavily on EI than textbooks. Fighting for representation is my form of self motivation and awareness. Becoming a Physics LA is my form of interpersonal management by being able to recognize and support other students’ struggles.
Find your ways you practice EI. Ask yourself how you impact others. Ask yourself how you can be inclusive and supportive of others’ struggles. Listen to others. Engineering is not an awards competition, it’s a competition to better the world, both physically and emotionally.